Lonely PowerGlove seeking Mike Tyson’s Punchout for friendship, possible serious relationship. Must be in good working order and not do that ghetto blue flashing screen deal. ‘Cause that just chafes.

I’m serious. If any of you bums has Mike Tyson, I need the hookup. What good is a PowerGlove when you’re playing Mario and Turtles Arcade?

Help a brother out. I’ll let you borrow Zelda…