Who in the world needs so many capital letters in a row that they can’t just hold down the shift key for a while with their pinkie?

Why do I even have this key on my keyboard? I don’t know.

That prime piece of keyboard real estate could be put to much better use than a key that is rarely used by anyone older than 15.

In fact, I can’t think of the last time I hit the caps lock key on purpose. Usually its only function is to annoy me when I’m trying to enter a password. Or mess with me when I’m typing. Honestly. What a waste of a key.

My keyboard doesn’t even have a numpad. I can’t do ten key because 4 shares a key with U. Little blue numbers hiding on otherwise occupied keys.

Then there’s all these little pictures on the F keys at the top of my keyboard.

That one’s a battery. Over there is a radio tower, or something of the sort. Some volume related buttons. With little lines coming out to indicate more or less sound. Brightness. You can tell because it has a picture of the sun, and the sun is bright. And what is that one? It’s like a flying saucer coming out from under a freeway overpass. I don’t know if I want to hit that button.

What do all those keys with pictures have in common? They’re secondary functions. They don’t get their own key. They have to share with other, more typewriter-like keys. Letters and the like. And you have to hold down Fn whenever you want to push the blue labels.

So how does caps lock luck out? Why does it get its very own key? I dunno.

I think I’d much rather dedicate a key to the radio tower. Or the ufo and the overpass. At least they look cool.

But now it’s disabled. Banished. No more accidentally pushing the wrong button. No more starting a sentence only to realize that I’m shouting. No more backspacing to correct excessive use of capital letters.

And I don’t think I’ll miss it!