Thu, 2008-07-03 09:05.
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Dear Utah Drivers, I hate you. You all suck. Love, Michelle
@Mishimmy via Twitter.
in honor of my good friend michelle, i'm posting a list of requests for utah drivers. these are in no particular order...
- if three or more people pass you in the right lane, you're in the wrong lane. merge right. kthx. corollary: if everyone is passing you on the right, you don't deserve to drive.
- please learn to use roundabouts. i don't want to see you stopping to let another driver in. if you just keep moving, it'll be a whole lot faster for everyone.
- when the light turns green... go! if everyone puts their foot on the gas at the same time, everyone makes it through the light. i can draw a picture if you want.
- on a similar note: the light at university and university in provo almost always turns into a protected left immediately after it turns red. please keep this in mind before putting your car into neutral and starting up a conversation with your bros in the back seat.
- stop running over scooters and motorcycles. they're here to stay, please start seeing them.
- if you're going 30, and i'm going 50, and i merge into your lane in front of you, don't slam on your brakes and start honking. you won't hit me. you couldn't hit me if you wanted to. promise.
- if there's an accident on the other side of the freeway, please pretend it's not there. we both know you can't maintain constant speed while ogling the carnage on the other side of the barrier. so just don't look, and you'll be less likely to cause a sympathy accident in this lane.
Comments
If I'm not tailgating the car in front of me, it might mean that I'm at a safe following distance and not inviting everyone and their mother to merge in front of me.
Seriously, on Utah hgihways, it is impossible to keep a two second following distance (the minimum recommended) because someone will always merge into that gap just in front of you.
I second this! Go Justin! Yay for you! Now it should be mandatory that everyone in Utah read this!
9. Please learn to stay in your own lane...random lane wandering is bad for your overall health.
Note to Lexi, this applies to you also...
I think this is more of a woman thing than it is a Utah thing.
Regarding #4, I believed this -- until I ran a red light there one day in anticipation of it turning green for me. I completely agree with everything else mentioned in this post, even though I am from Utah :)
i used to think it always turned green. i've been tricked by it before though. so now i've decided that it usually turns green, especially if the person in front of you decides to stop paying attention and take a bit of a break...
It's based on time of day. If in a time when predicted traffic is higher, there is a lag left. During non-rush (basically between 11pm and 6am it's "normal".
And AMEN to all the other items.
Oh and Utah drivers don't look before they change lanes when they finally do change lanes! They turn on their blinker and don't get over until the last possible minute. It's as if they want to cut you off!
Oh and Pass on the left!!! Big trucks cannot see you on the right! If you pass a Semi on the right you deserve to be run off the road!